The Hot Mess
by prplemyth
Summary: Malfoy absolutely must have the hot mess in the bar - absolutely must.


**A/N: Well, I'm back! I haven't been on fanfiction for ages – sorry about that. Well, I hope this works – this idea has been in my head for ages.**

**Oh, and I do not own Hot Mess. That belongs to Cobra Starship. I also do not own Harry Potter or the characters. They belong to J. K. Rowling, the lucky woman.**

**I hope you like this!**

_You were a problem child  
Been grounded your whole life_

Damnit, Pansy, quit bringing me to these goddamn clubs.. All I want is to be home," I think, sulking as usual. Pansy hits me. "Oh quit whining, you loser."

"What?"

"You just said you wanted to be at home. Quit being such a child."

I hadn't realized I had been speaking out loud. "Well, I do want to be at home, you moron. My father is in prison for the rest of his life, my mother is obsessed with making me feel better, and all I want to do is stay at home. A bottle of firewhiskey and a dirty magazine is all I want right now."

Pansy winces. "You are disgusting. Do you want to meet that girl I met to set you up with?"

I nod absent mindedly, "Yeah, yeah, okay," my attention is caught by some short brunette chick shaking her ass, "S-sure…"

Pansy walks away, "I'll go wait for her outside, I guess. You coming."

"No."

I can hear her sigh behind me, even over the loud music. "Fine, you loser."

**  
**_So now you're running wild  
Playing with them good girls_

She's not even dancing with anyone, at least no one is dancing with her. People are staring, but most with disgust or awe. I don't see anyone who recognizes her. She's just going insane all on her own. It's pretty damn hot.

_No that ain't your style _

_You think you're hot shit,  
And oh, I love it, I love it  
Yeah, yeah_

And now she's grinding on some guy – I don't even think she's seen his face. The drink in her hand is going everywhere – what is this girl trying to do?

If it's getting attention she's after, she's getting it.

Damn, she's getting it.

_Stumbling but yeah, you're still looking hella fine_

Obviously, she's not quite a pro walking in heels.

**  
**_Keep doing what you do and I'ma make you mine_

If she keeps it up, I'm going for it. I only really go for the girls who are fully gone.

_Well, you're a hot mess and I'm falling for you  
And I'm like hot damn let me make you my boo  
Cause you can shake it, shake it, shake it  
Yeah you know what to do  
You're a hot mess  
I'm loving it, hell yes_

I see Pansy walk in with the girl she's supposed to be setting me up with. My blind date can't compare with the girl on the dance floor

And I honestly don't care about the blind date.

I walk up to the dancing girl – the hot mess – and slowly edge away the dude grinding behind her, and I begin dancing.

I hadn't noticed until now, but holy crap, this dress is short.

Black looks so damn good on her.

All this, and I don't even know her name.

_I've been hypnotized  
The city's your playground,  
I watch you take a bite  
At 5am roaming the streets  
Drunk all night_

_You think your hot shit  
And oh, I love it, I love it  
Yeah, yeah_

Shit. Did not see this coming.

Her drink spills all over me, and I frantically try to shake off the liquid.

She slurs into my ear, "Sorry, sexy. I guess I should just go now."

How the hell does she make drunk talk sound hot?

_Stumbling but yeah, you're still looking hella fine  
Keep doing what you do and I'ma make you mine_

I try to catch up with her as she struts off, falling over herself in her high hooker heels, but, through the gyrating crowd, I can't catch her.

I push past people, and I accidentally grope some chick, but I keep my eyes on the back of the hot mess' head – I need to hook up with her tonight.

Screw the girl Pansy's got for me, I'm going home with the hot mess.

_Well, you're a hot mess and I'm falling for you  
And I'm like hot damn, let me make you my boo  
Cause you can shake it, shake it, shake it  
Yeah you know what to do_

Damn it. It seems like she knows exactly how to act to get every guy hot and bothered. She walks over to the bar – of course, one of those "you can't get there from here" situations from where I stand – and flips her long curls over her shoulder, deliberately forcing her chest into every guys vision. My head is spinning. I need her.

_You're a hot mess  
I'm loving it, hell yes_

_You're a hot mess and I'm falling for you  
And I'm like hot damn let me make you my boo  
Cause you can shake it, shake it, shake it  
Yeah you know what to do  
You're a hot mess  
I'm loving it, hell yes_

I need her tonight. Or right freaking now, if I could have her. Is that illegal in clubs?

_If you're dancing up on tables  
You go you go, you got it girl  
Say that you're unstable  
You go coco, you got it girl  
Dancing up on tables  
Say that you're unstable_

Oh, hell no. No she's not. She's on top of the table, holy crap, that's…that's. That is insane. Not just that she's on the table, the fact that about five seconds ago four other girls were acting like idiots up there – now they're all gone, and the spot light is on her. Literally, the spotlight is on her.

I start to walk up to the table, ruffling my blonde hair – it always makes me look better.

She's mine.

_You're a haha haha ha yeah you're a hot mess  
Haha haha ha we're singing hell yes_

_Well, you're a hot mess and I'm falling for you  
And I'm like hot damn let me make you my boo  
Cause you can shake it, shake it, shake it_

I step behind her on the table, and we start dancing like I've never grinded before – hot as hell, this girl.

_Yeah you know what to do  
You're a hot mess  
I'm loving it, hell yes_

I'm loving it a little too much.

Screw it, I'm taking her home anyway.

_You're a hot mess and I'm falling for you  
And I'm like hot damn let me make you my boo  
Cause you can shake it, shake it, shake it  
Yeah you know what to do_

She goes to step off the table, and I hear her laugh over the music.

"Bye, hotstuff, see you later," she says in a voice completely lacking the alcoholic inhibition I'd heard before

I follow her down and, of course, slip on the puddle of vodka that she accidentally splashed all over the table. Of course she misses it.

People are giving me stupid looks, so I just flip them off.

She's already twenty, thirty people in front of me – I push past them, going as fast as I can, trying to follow her. She's started to move more gracefully now, strutting just like…Just like someone I know. I can't place it though.

I run between people, into spaces I barely spot or pushing past people dancing sex-with-your-clothes-on style – and I'm out the door.

**  
**_You're a hot mess_

She's adjusting her dress, walking up to four people I almost recognize.

_I'm loving it, hell yes (hell yes)_

Three with red hair, one with black.

_  
Hot mess_

The shortest man with red hair and a face I recognize, is holding a twenty in his hand. His jaw has dropped to the floor. The girl, another with red hair, is laughing so hard she has to lean on the black haired guy to her left, who is smirked and elbowing the third, tallest, red headed man to his right.

_I'm loving it, hell yes (hell yes)_

She goes and kisses the tallest man on the cheek, and he still looks like someone kicked him.

"Oh, calm down, Ron, it's just a joke," and turns to the shorter red headed man, "George, I did it, pay up."

George, still in shock, hands over the money.

"Dude, I am never daring you to do anything ever again – you get way too crazy when someone challenges you."

The former hot mess shrugs and smiles. "What can I say, I can't turn down a dare."

_  
Hot mess_

Hermione Granger turns around, looks down at my jeans, and smirks. "Mudblood got you hot, huh Malfoy?"

_I'm loving it, hell yes_

**A/N2: God, that was fun to write. Sorry if it's a bit choppy – it was written and edited in about two hours. Review if you wish, it would make my day since this was me FINALLY getting out of my writer's block. Love you all!**


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